It  occurred  to  me  as  I  was  writing  this  on  the  computer  that  I  never  run  out  of  pages  to  write  on. Whenever  I  get  to  the  end  of  a  page,  another  one  appears.  It  seems  to  be  that  my  life,  and  my Recovery  are  that  way  too. “How  many  times  do  I  have  to  do  these  steps”?  I  have  said.  The  answer  is  always,  as  many  times  as you  want  to  learn  more  about  yourself,  and  what  you  are  here  to  do  in  this  world  as  a  recovering woman. I’m  in  the  midst  of  doing  the  12  Steps  again,  coming  up  on  the  fourth  step,  and  I’m  finding  them new  and  exciting  after  27  years  of  learning  this  new  way  of  life.  I  always  have  so  much  to  learn,  or maybe  it’s  that  I’ve  forgotten  a  lot  of  things,  and  need  a  constant  reminder  of  how  to  live  sober. When   I   think   I   have   the   answer   to   something   is   the   time   when   I   need   to   run,   not   walk,   to   my sponsor,  or  some  other  sober  member  of  AA  who  can  give  me  counsel.  I  am  always  a  beginner, every  day. I   start   the   day   with   the   3rd   Step   prayer,   and   one   by   Thomas   Merton,   which   I’ll   share   with   you because  he  speaks  to  me  from  a  very  humble  and  loving  place.

My  Lord,  God,  I  have  no  idea  where  I  am  going.  I  cannot  know  for  certain  where  it  will  end.  Nor  do  I really  know  myself,  and  the  fact  that  I  think  I  am  following  Your  will  does  not  mean  that  I  am  actually doing  so,  but  I  believe  that  the  desire  to  please  You  does,  in  fact  please  You,  and  I  hope  that  I  have that  desire  in  all  that  I  am  doing. I  hope  that  I  will  never  do  anything  apart  from  that  desire,  and  I  know  that  if  I  do  this  You  will  lead me  by  the  right  road,  though  I  may  know  nothing  about  it.  Therefore,  I  will  trust  You  always  though  I may  seem  to  be  lost,  and  in  the  shadow  of  death.  I  will  not  fear,  for  You  will  never  leave  me  to  face my  perils  alone. As  the  end  of  the  year  approaches,  I  take  special  care  of  my  spiritual  health,  and  I  often  remind myself  to  take  care  when  attending  parties  and  functions.  Lots  of  liquor  is  disguised  in  food  and seemingly   harmless   drinks.   Be   aware.   I   also   have   to   take   extra   effort   to   rest   more,   and   not   get caught  up  in  the  chaos  of  the  season.  H.A.L.T  is  in  my  spiritual  toolbox  at  all  times,  reminding  me  not to  get  too  Hungry,  Angry,  Lonely,  or  Tired. It’s  easy  to  think  that  “everyone  else”  has  somewhere  to  go,  and  someone  special  to  be  with.  We  do too!  They  are  waiting  for  us  by  the  phone,  on  the  Internet,  or  sitting  at  an  AA  meeting,  alone.  This  is the  time  when  doing  service  for  others  will  pay  us  back  two-­‐fold.  I  don’t  want  to  ever  forget  to  reach out  to  other  AA’s.  That’s  certainly  what  you  did  for  me  when  I  showed  up  at  7:30am  at  Boat  Quay last  month! Blessings  to  you  all  this  holiday  season,  and  wishing  you  miracles  in  the  New  Year! Tricia  C,  Sacramento  CA,  USA