The  Singapore  A.A.  HI/PI  Group  has  agreed  to  pilot  the  Alcoholics  Anonymous  “Bridging  the  Gap” initiative  together  with  IMH.  Details  about  this  initiative  can  be  found  in  the  A.A.  pamphlet  “Bridging The   Gap   Between   Treatment   &   A.A.   Through   Temporary   Contact   Groups”.     This   pamphlet   is available  online  at  www.aa.org.    Below  are  some  excerpts  from  that  pamphlet.

“Part   of   Bridging   the   Gap   between   a   treatment   program   and   A.A.   is   the   Temporary   Contact Program,  which  is  designed  to  help  the  alcoholic  in  an  alcoholism  treatment  program  make  that transition.

As  you  know,  one  of  the  more  “slippery”  places  in  the  journey  to  sobriety  is  between  the  door  of  the facility  and  the  nearest  A.A.  group  or  meeting.  Some  of  us  can  tell  you  that,  even  though  we  heard of  A.A.  in  treatment,  we  were  too  fearful  to  go. A.A.  experience  suggests  that  attending  meetings  regularly  is  critical.  In  order  to  bridge  the  gap,  A.A. members   have   volunteered   to   be   temporary   contacts   and   introduce   newcomers   to   Alcoholics Anonymous. It   is   suggested   that   the   temporary   contact   take   the   newcomer   to   a   variety   of   A.A.   meetings; introduce  him  or  her  to  other  A.A.s;  insure  that  he  or  she  has  the  phone  numbers  of  several  A.A. members,  and  share  the  experience  of  sponsorship  and  a  home  group.”  [Excerpt  from  Bridging  The Gap  Between  Treatment  &  A.A.  Through  Temporary  Contact  Groups”,  Alcoholics  Anonymous.] If  you  would  like  to  help… If  you  would  like  to  help  in  this  very  important  Twelfth  Step  work  and  have  at  least  one  year  of continuous   sobriety   in   the   A.A.   program,   please   contact   the   Singapore   A.A.   HI/PI   Group   on hi.pi.aa@outlook.com.

“I’m  not  telling  you  it’s  going  to  be  easy  -­‐  I’m  telling  you  it’s  going  to  be  worth  it  ~  Art  Williams A  word  of  encouragement  after  failure  is  worth  more  than  an  hour  of  praise  after  success  ~  Dale Partridge Be  patient  with  yourself.  You  are  growing  stronger  every  day.    The  weight  of  the  world  will become  lighter  …  and  you  will  begin  to  shine  brighter.  Don’t  give  up.  ~  Robert  Tew May  the  long  time  sun  shine  upon  you,  All  love  surround  you,  and  the  pure  light  within  you Guide  your  way  on    ~  Unknown A   moment   of   patience   in   a   moment   of   anger   saves   you   a   hundred   moments   of   regret   ~ Unknown Be  a  reflection  of  what  you  would  like  to  receive.  If  you  want  love,  give  love.  If  you  want  truth, be  truthful.  If  you  want  respect,  give  respect.  What  you  give  out  will  always  return~    Unknown You  are  always  responsible  for  how  you  act,  no  matter  how  you  feel  ~  Unknown

Service  –  I  am  Responsible Ahead  of  the  service  workshop  scheduled  on  29th  August,  one  of  our  members  has  kindly  shared what   service   means   to   them   and   how   it   has   helped   them   stay   sober   and   live   in   grace   and gratitude.  We  hope  you  can  all  join  us  on  the  day,  details  included  at  the  end  of  this  article. I  hope  that  I  can  share  on  the  value  that  service  has  had  in  my  sobriety. Just   to   remind   ourselves   and   set   the   scene,   the   Big   Book   says:   Practical   experience   shows   that NOTHING  will  so  much  insure  immunity  from  drinking  as  intensive  work  with  other  alcoholics.  It works  when  other  activities  fail. It  is  important  that  I  speak  up-­‐front  about  my  sister  who  I  was  not  able  to  help  get  sober.  She  died  of this  illness  4  years  ago  when  I  was  9  years  sober.  It  is  particularly  poignant  because  she  played  a huge  part  in  my  journey  to  sobriety.  She  was  the  first  person  that  I  was  really  honest  with  when  she confronted  me  about  my  drinking  and  she  was  the  one  who  organized  for  me  to  go  to  rehab.  The fact  that  I  was  not  able  to  repay  this  profound  debt  of  gratitude  I  feel  to  her  is  important  because  it underlines   my   personal   powerlessness   around   getting   anyone   sober.   I   am   powerless   over alcohol….that  is  what  step  one  tells  me  and  that  is  my  experience.    I  can  assure  you  there  is  no-­‐one  I have  had  a  stronger  desire  to  get  sober  than  my  sister  –  she  was  my  best  friend  and  the  mother  of  3 girls  who  I  love  with  a  fierce  passion  –  and  I  had  no  power  to  do  so. So  this  very  personal  experience  forms  the  foundation  of  my  approach  to  service.  I  have  no  power to  get  anyone  sober  or  to  get  anyone  drunk  for  that  matter  –  and  I  am  therefore  purely  an  agent  of the  only  power  that  in  my  experience  can  get  and  keep  me  sober;  I  am  a  “trusted  servant”. I  fully  understand  this  today  but  this  was  not  always  the  case;  my  ego  has  certainly  reared  its  ugly head   in   service   related   matters   and   some   days,   still   hampers   me   in   performing   my   “primary purpose”  –  to  stay  sober  and  help  another  alcoholic”. To  give  you  a  few  examples  which  some  of  you  may  relate  to:

• I  have  not  wanted  to  take  calls  or  give  up  my  time  for  12  step  work  preferring  to  sit  in  my  self obsession  which  is  always  lurking • I   never   wanted   to   get   involved   in   Intergroup   believing   myself   to   be   too   busy   and   too important • I   have   been   flattered   that   people   have   asked   me   to   be   a   sponsor,   feeding   my   ego   and delusion  –  rather  than  just  being  grateful  for  the  opportunity  to  be  of  service; • I  have  argued  with  sponsees  about  the  steps,  about  their  actions  or  lack  thereof  and  I  have tried  hard  to  control  their  sober  journey,  playing  perfectly  to  my  self-­‐righteous,  critical  and judgmental  defects  –  rather  than  remembering  that  my  only  role  is  to  provide  suggestions, not  control  the  outcome; • I   have   wanted   to   “resign”   when   sponsees   have   relapsed   full   of   self-­‐pity   and   defeat, forgetting  that  I  have  stayed  sober  and  that  I  am  not  in  the  business  of  managing  outcomes • I  have,  on  occasion,  taken  AA  totally  for  granted  and  not  been  grateful  for  the  service  that people  do  every  day  to  ensure  its  longevity  and  for  the  people  who  were  here  when  I  first came  into  the  rooms

Not  many  sign  of  “trusted  servant”  humility  in  these  thoughts  and  how  easy  it  is  to  forget  to  give back  what  has  been  so  freely  given  to  me!    I  am  a  natural  taker  so  giving  back,  getting  involved, acting  grateful  for  my  sobriety  have  all  been  things  I  have  learnt  to  do  here. Service  can  take  many  forms. Firstly,  it  never  crossed  my  mind  until  recently  how  much  gratitude  I  should  have  for  all  the  silent service  that  goes  on  in  AA  to  ensure  the  meetings  happen;  the  chairs  are  out,  the  banners  or  slogans are  posted,  the  literature  is  available,  the  scripts  are  written  etc.  There  are  no  fairies,  all  these  jobs are  done  by  people  who  care  and  volunteer  their  time  to  ensure  AA’s  smooth  running  on  a  daily basis.  This  is  something  we  can  all  contribute  to  and  a  great  example  is  one  of  my  sponsees  who gets  to  the  7:30am  morning  meeting  early  to  pour  the  water  into  glasses  for  everyone  attending; small,  silent,  not  looking  for  thanks  or  a  reward  -­‐  and  very  powerful. Coming  to  the  meetings  and  sharing  honestly  is,  in  itself,  great  service.  What  would  happen  to  AA and  those  needing  help  if  we  all  decided  we  were  “too  well”  to  go  to  meetings?  While  I  was  so  full  of self-­‐centred  fear  in  my  first  year  of  sobriety  to  share,  I  am  thankful  that  there  were  people  who turned  up  to  those  first  meetings,  people  who  did  service  by  sharing  their  experience,  strength  and hope  and  people  who  kept  me  coming  back  because  I  related  to  their  journeys.  I  heard  bits  of  my own  story  in  those  shares  and  for  the  first  time  I  heard  people  share  things  that  I  felt  but  which  I  had never   told   anyone,   because   I   was   too   ashamed.   We   do   not   know   how   our   shares   may   impact someone’s  journey  and  having  the  courage  to  share  honestly  is  service  we  can  all  do. Today  I  am  grateful  for  the  reassuring  presence  of  people  in  meetings  who  have  long  term  sobriety, the  continuity  and  the  inspiration  of  their  unfolding  sober  journeys  –  and  particularly  when  I  go  back to  London  where  I  got  sober,  I  am  reassured  to  see  those  people  who  were  in  the  rooms  when  I  first arrived  and  I  am  glad  they  continue  to  do  service  by  showing  up. I   am   also   grateful   for   new-­‐comers   and   people   who   have   less   sobriety   in   terms   of   ‘days’.   The newcomers  do  service  in  helping  to  remind  me  how  difficult  it  is  to  get  sober  and  how  I  never  want to  try  and  do  that  again  –  and  with  fellow  journey-­‐ers  in  the  rooms,  I  share  the  struggles  that  we  all face  living  life  on  life’s  terms  and  staying  sober.  I  always  get  enormous  comfort  and  courage  from meetings  and  service  for  me  begins  right  here  –  “together  we  are  stronger”. And  then  there  are  more  “formal”  service  positions  and  commitments.  My  first  service  position  was “greeting”  at  the  Fulham  Road  Beginners  Meeting,  7:30pm  in  Chelsea.  I  got  sober  in  Feb  so  it  was dark  and  cold  standing  out  on  the  London  streets.  I  then  did  the  coffee  and  tea  commitment  at  the same  meeting. As  I  said,  I  was  too  scared  to  share  in  the  meetings  but  these  service  positions  helped  me  to  feel “part  of”  a  group  I  wasn’t  even  sure  I  wanted  to  belong  to  yet.  They  anchored  me  and  kept  me coming  back  to  the  meeting,  building  relationships  and  fellowships  and  eventually  enabling  me  to hear   what   I   needed   to   begin   my   sober   journey.   Similarly,   I   love   a   story   my   sponsor   shares   of   a woman  who  had  a  biscuit  commitment  at  a  Tuesday  night  meeting.  She  had  a  bad  day  on  Sunday and   wanted   to   drink.   She   then   remembered   that   she   had   to   take   biscuits   to   the   Tuesday   night

meeting  so  she  decided  to  wait  to  have  a  drink  until  Wednesday  –  a  drink  she  never  took  and  she credits  this  to  her  service  commitment. Since   those   early   commitments,   I   have   chaired   meetings   and   I   have   held   treasury   and   literature positions.  Currently  I  am  Chair  Person  for  Intergroup  having  held  the  communications  position  for nearly  4  years  . InterGroup  is  a  great  example  for  me  of  how  service  works.  I  was  pretty  outraged  when  my  sponsor first  suggested  that  I  get  an  IG  service  position  in  Singapore.  I  felt  I  was  doing  plenty  of  other  service, I  had  helped  to  set  up  the  morning  and  women’s  meeting  and  was  very  much  resting  on  my  laurels. However  my  sponsor’s  suggestions  are  never  really  just  suggestions  and  so  I  found  myself  at  the  first of  my  Intergroup  meetings  at  the  maddeningly  frustrating  time  of  12:30pm  on  Saturday.  Did  these people  not  have  lives,  did  they  not  know  about  lunch  with  friends  and  family  on  the  weekend,  did they  not  have  better  things  to  do? I  remember  clearly  sitting  through  those  first  meetings  seething  with  resentment  –  a  number  of  you were  there.  Somehow  however  I  found  myself  saying  yes  to  the  communications  chair  commitment which  involves  answering  emails  that  come  into  the  Singapore  AA  helpline  and  arranging  12  step calls  as  appropriate  –  as  well  as  organizing  a  group  of  volunteers  to  man  the  helpline  phone.    This commitment  was  one  of  the  most  inspiring  and  rewarding  commitments  I  have  ever  done.  I  got  the privilege  of  working  with  people  in  our  fellowship  who  selflessly  went  on  12  step  calls  at  all  times  of the  day  and  night  –  and  I  shall  never  forget  an  incident  when  2  of  the  guys  went  to  offer  support  to a  visitor  who  had  relapsed  on  business  in  Singapore.  He  was  holed  up  in  a  hotel  in  Clarke  Quay  and his  desperate  wife  who  was  in  the  fellowship  called  from  the  US  to  ask  for  our  help  at  10pm  at  night. The  objective  was  to  get  him  on  the  plane  the  next  morning  and  these  2  guys  from  the  Singapore  AA stayed  with  this  guy  all  night.  It  is  so  inspiring  to  me  watching  this  fellowship  in  active  service  and very  humbling  too. I  also  remember  answering  an  email  from  a  guy  from  Mexico  who  had  been  offered  his  dream  job  in Singapore  with  one  of  the  integrated  resorts.  He  sent  an  email  to  AA  Singapore  to  find  out  about  the fellowship  and  meetings  before  he  accepted  the  job  because  he  understood  that  his  sobriety  had  to come  before  anything  else.  Again,  this  was  a  great  reminder  to  me  that  day  and  has  always  stuck with   me.     The   communications   chair   service   position   connected   me   with   so   many   people   in   the fellowship  and  to  see  people  come  in  to  the  rooms  after  one  of  these  calls  for  help  was  rewarding. One  person  told  me  that  had  we  not  responded  to  his  call  as  quickly  as  we  did,  he  does  not  know  if he  would  ever  have  found  his  way  into  AA;  a  day’s  delay  may  have  been  fatal  and  I  am  humbled  to have  played  a  small  part  in  his  and  others  journey  in  this  way. So  these  are  a  few  examples  of  the  rewards  I  would  have  missed  had  I  got  my  own  way  and  not participated   in   Intergroup   service.   So   the   lesson   -­‐   and   this   is   something   I   was   told   in   very   early sobriety  -­‐  is  to  always  say  yes  to  service  and  get  into  action;  there  may  be  occasions  when  I  wish  I have  more  time  or  whatever  but  I  have  never  ever  regretted  carving  out  space  to  do  service. Sponsorship  is  a  service  and  I  sponsor  a  number  of  people.  What  is  sponsorship?  I  have  had  two sponsors  –  one  in  London  and  one  here.    They  both  have  different  styles  of  sponsoring  and  for  me, they  were  and  are  exactly  what  I  needed  at  differing  points  in  my  sobriety.  The  key  thing  they  have in  common  is  that  I  want  what  they  both  have  –  and  for  me,  that  is  that  they  “walk  the  talk”.

I  am  attracted  to  people  who  sound  eloquent  and  sober  in  meetings  but  I  am  more  attracted  to people  who  share  what  is  going  on  and  the  spiritual  tools  that  they  are  using  to  get  through  life  on life’s  terms.  I  asked  my  current  sponsor  for  instance  to  sponsor  me  straight  after  I  heard  her  share on  the  step  3  ‘pause’  and  how  she  was  using  it  that  day  in  a  situation  which  demanded  right  thinking and  right  sizing. I   want   the   peace,   serenity   and   right-­‐mindedness   that   she   brings   to   everyday   living   by   using   this programme   and   its   steps   rigorously.   I   have   known   her   while   she   has   gone   through   personal bankruptcy,  her  partner’s  cancer,  her  own  health  issues,  severe  depression  and  she  has  given  me strength  and  faith  because  I  have  seen  her  walk  through  these  things  with  real  grace,  dignity  and  a spiritual   serenity.   I   want   all   that.     So   I   think   the   first   requirement   for   a   great   sponsor/sponsee relationship  is  that  you  want  what  your  sponsor  has. It  therefore  follows  logically  that  if  you  want  what  they  have,  you  have  to  be  prepared  to  do  what they  do!  This  means  that  I  have  to  be  open-­‐minded  enough  and  humble  enough  to  be  teachable  so that  I  can  follow  her  “suggestions”  without  my  own  embellishment  or  re-­‐interpretation!  Just  as  they are  given,  clearly  and  directly. While  I  have  often  wanted  a  sponsor  to  tell  me  what  to  do,  a  sponsor’s  role  is  not  to  be  a  counsellor, a  doctor,  a  psychiatrist,  a  headhunter  or  a  banker  -­‐    a  sponsor’s  role  is  to  take  you  through  the  steps of   AA   –   to   share   with   you   what   they   have   learnt   “HAVING   HAD   A   SPIRITUAL   AWAKENING   AS   A RESULT  OF  THESE  STEPS…”  So  in  summary,  a  sponsor’s  job  is  to  guide  the  sponsee  so  they  too  can have  a  spiritual  awakening  as  a  result  of  working  the  steps.  That  is  it. The  other  key  requirement  for  a  sponsor  is  trustworthiness  and  total  discretion/confidentiality.  I came   in   to   AA   not   trusting   anyone   and   therefore   not   being   emotionally   intimate   with   anyone, including   my   husband   with   whom   I   had   two   children.   My   sponsor   has   been   my   first   truly ‘emotionally’  intimate  relationship  and  this  in  and  of  itself  has    been  a  huge  part  of  my  journey  out of  the  isolation  and  madness  of  this  disease.  There  is  nothing  that  I  will  not  share  with  her  and  my experience  has  been  that  she  is  there  for  me  unconditionally. She  is  not  someone  who  I  put  on  a  pedestal,  she  is  not  my  higher  power,  she  cannot  keep  me  sober. But  the  truth  is  -­‐  and  this  may  be  because  of  the  purity  and  honesty  in  the  relationship  -­‐  I  often  hear God  talking  to  me  through  her  and  certainly  when  I  open  my  mind  and  heart  in  writing  or  speaking to  her,  I  get  clarity  which  seems  to  be  God-­‐given. I  am  a  beneficiary  of  my  sponsor  doing  service  every  day  and  I  am  also  doing  service  by  being  a sponsee.  Yes,  being  a  sponsee  is  great  service. I  cannot  tell  you  how  many  times  a  sponsee  calling  or  writing  has  interrupted  my  day  just  when  I needed  to  allow  God  back  into  my  thinking  or  actions.  Often  I  don’t  realize  it  and  I  can  momentarily resist  picking  up  the  call  or  reading  the  mail,  but  the  moment  I  do,  the  shift  happens  and  transforms my  day  –  ALWAYS.  And  when  I  am  travelling  and  not  getting  to  as  many  meetings  as  usual,  the connection   with   sponsees   is   critical   to   ensure   I   remember   who   I   am   and   that   I   need   to   keep   a conscious  connection  with  a  HP,  if  I  am  to  stay  spiritually  fit  and  useful.

So what are the BENEFITS of service and why does it have such a central role in the AA triangle. First and most importantly, it keeps me sober. This is what the Big Book says: When ALL else fails, reach out and help another alcoholic” so in short, I do service because I don’t want to drink again. This is exactly Bill’s story as laid out in the Big Book. Here was Bill, 6 months sober, in a hotel after a difficult day at work with a bar looking very inviting. We can all picture it and totally transport ourselves to that place. But Bill didn’t want to drink so rather than just trying to think away the obsession that was on him, he took action and made 10 calls – he persisted until finally he reached Henrietta who knew Bob. Bob didn’t really want to see him but Bill went anyway, stayed sober and AA was born. This perfectly illustrates why service is so vital to our sobriety. So how does service work to keep me sober? • Probably most importantly, it gets me out of self – selfish and self-­‐centred in root of my troubles and the book tells me that my very existence depends on my constant thought of others. This is a key element to service for me because left to my own devices, I will sit and think about myself all day long. I have many examples of not wanting to show up to meet a sponsee or go to Intergroup but when I do, the shift happens and magically I find my solution to the “restless, irritable and discontent”. There is a spiritual experience in that moment and as I forget about me, myself and I -­‐ and open my mind and heart to someone else… • I relate to another alcoholic, which helps me to get out of the perception that I am somehow “terminally unique” and “special and different”; worse than or better than others -­‐ and it helps to end the isolation I lived with and can still sometimes want to lapse back into • I get to practice ‘intimacy’ and share my vulnerability when I do service and this has been a huge part of me starting to build healthy relationships inside and outside of the rooms; I never wanted to be intimate with anyone and build real relationships based on honesty, trust and respect. • I find empathy with another alcoholic – it reminds me of where I come from and who I am and for me this is critical. I have to remember the facts so that I can surrender to being an alcoholic every day; if I don’t and start believing some of the delusions that go on in my head, I won’t be out there looking for a solution….that is the beginning of the end game. • Service in all its forms teaches me patience and tolerance and compassion – helping me to allow others to live their own lives and make their own choices. This is a continual journey for me – to overcome my desire to control others and service has been a great place for me to practice letting go of outcomes; just putting in the action and leaving the results to God. • I practice humility in service as a “trusted servant” – no more and no less and this helps to get me right-­‐sized • I am able to learn and practice unconditional love and giving without expectation, a concept I knew very little about before I came to these rooms. I always did everything with an agenda to get something that I wanted or not loose something that I had

• It  reinforces  my  commitment  to  my  own  programme  as  I  work  with  others  and  this  is  a  great gift  of  sharing  my  experience  with  sponsees.  Sponsorship  as  I  have  mentioned  is  not  about do  what  I  say,  it  is  about  do  what  I  do;

• Service   is   a   big   part   of   my   sober   spiritual   journey:   I   have   heard   people   say   that   being   of service  to  others  IS  the  most  spiritual  thing  that  we  can  do  ;

• Service  provides  me  with  perspective  that  I  cannot  get  on  my  own.  When  I  am  stuck  in  my own  small  thinking,  I  cannot  get  perspective  but  when  I  listen  to  you,  my  issues  transform themselves  into  manageable  chunks

• I  get  inspired  by  how  this  programme  works  –  seeing  people  get  well  is  such  a  gift  as  the literature  rightly  points  out  : “Life   will   take   on   a   new   meaning.   To   watch   people   recover,   to   see   them   help   others,   to   watch loneliness   vanish,   to   see   a   fellowship   grow   up   about   you,   to   have   a   host   of   friends   –   this   is   an experience   you   must   not   miss.   We   know   you   will   not   want   to   miss   it.   Frequent   contact   with newcomers  and  with  each  other  is  the  bright  spot  of  our  lives.

And  finally,  service  has  played  a  huge  part  in  one  of  the  promises  coming  true  :  “we  will  not  regret the  past  nor  wish  to  shut  the  door  on  it  and  we  shall  see  how  our  experiences  can  come  to  help others”.  This  is  a  big  one.  I  came  in  with  so  much  shame  as  a  drunk  wife  and  mother  of  two  children and  an  employee  of  a  major  bank  doing  my  job  in  blackout.  I  came  in  with  damaged  relationships with  people  who  I  truly  loved  and  cared  for  and  I  had  broken  my  own  moral  code  in  more  ways  and more  times  than  I  care  to  remember;  spiritually,  mentally  and  emotionally  bankrupt. And  today,  I  don’t  carry  that  shame  or  that  baggage;  in  fact  I  feel  real  gratitude  for  my  experiences because  in  some  small  way,  sharing  these  experiences  with  others  has  enabled  me  to  be  useful. So  what  are  the  REQUIREMENTS  for  service?  Do  you  have  to  be  sober  for  a  certain  length  of  time  or be  particularly  spiritually  advanced  or  what? All  my  sponsor  reminds  me  as  it  relates  to  service  is  that  “we  cannot  give  away  what  we  do  not have”. AA  is  not  about  giving  advice,  it  is  not  a  counselling  service,  it  is  just  about  alcoholics  sharing  and passing  on  their  experiences  of  getting  and  staying  sober  one  day  at  a  time.  This  is  therefore  about sharing   the   “walk”   not   talking   the   “talk”.   As   it   says   in   A   Vision   for   you   “You   cannot   transmit something  you  haven’t  got.  See  to  it  that  your  relationship  with  Him  is  right,  and  great  events  will come  to  pass  for  you  and  countless  others.  This  is  the  Great  Fact  for  us……” Bill’s  story  and  his  determination  that  night  to  find  someone  to  help  stay  sober  rather  than  go  to  the bar  illustrates  the  point  well  for  me.  Bill  was  desperate  –  he  was  not  particularly  “well”  or  “sober”  – he  wanted  to  drink  -­‐  but  he  knew  he  needed  to  take  action  and  help  another  if  he  was  to  stand  a chance  and  stay  sober.  This  clearly  shows  us  is  that  it  is  not  about  us  being  “well  enough”  or”  feeling

good enough” to do service; it is in fact the reverse: it is about us doing service so we get to be ‘well’, so we get to feel better and so we get to stay sober. It is our solution. We cannot wait until we think we are well enough to do service or until we get to step 12; we have to dive in and recognize that there is value in all our experiences which can help others – and in the sharing of ourselves and in our vulnerability, we get to stay sober. This is what people mean when they talk about acting ourselves well. • I thought I would end by focusing on a few of the key principles that are contained in ‘working with others’ in the Big Book because these are the principles it is suggested we keep in mind: • We can help when no one else can; Because of our own drinking experiences, we can be uniquely useful to other alcoholics. • Do not exhibit any passion for crusade or reform. • Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked for you. Offer him friendship and fellowship. Tell him that if he wants to get well you will do anything to help. • Tell him EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU. Stress the spiritual nature of the programme freely. Make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God and that he can choose any conception he likes. The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a power greater than himself and to live by spiritual principles • If he is not interested in your solution you may need to drop him until he changes his mind. He should not be pushed or prodded. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within. • IF you leave someone alone, he may come to the realization that he needs you quicker than otherwise. To spend too much time on any one situation is to deny some other alcoholic an opportunity to live and be happy. • If he wants to find another way, encourage him. We do not have a monopoly on God; we merely have an approach that worked with us. • It is important that you are clear that your attempt to help him is a VITAL part in your own recovery; he may be helping you more than you are helping him. Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be – cost what it may in terms of nuisance or interference

_  _  _  _ You  are  never  too  old  to  set  another  goal  or  dream  a  new  dream  ~  C.S.  Lewis I  have  seen  and  met  angels  wearing  the  disguise  of  ordinary  people  living  ordinary  lives ~  Tracy  Chapman Be  thankful  for  the  bad  things  in  life,  For  they  opened  your  eyes  to  the  good  things  you  were  not paying  attention  to  before  ~  Anon

Alconyms -­‐ Inspriring & Insightful Recovery Catchphrases Thanks to another fellow for this editions’s sayings and the rather catchy new heading of Alconyms. We would like to keep this as a regular feature and, therefore, appreciate all contributions. Please send these to newsletter@singaporeaa.org for this regular feature. AA = Altered Attitudes AA = Always Aware AA = Avoid Anger AA = Absolute Abstinence AA = Always Awesome AA = All Accepted AA = Achieve Anything AA = Always Alive AA = Attitude Adjustment GRA CE = Gently Releasing All Conscious Expectations GIF TS = Getting It From The Steps HOP E = Hang On! Peace Exists HOP E = Heart Open; Please Enter The body heal so with play, the mind heals with laughter and the spirit heals with joy ~ Unknown I am in competition with no one. I run my own race. I have no desire to play the game of being better than anyone, in any way, shape, or form. I just aim to improve, to be better than I was before. That’s me and I’m free. ~ Jenny G. Perry Kindness is not an act, It is a lifestyle ~ Anthony Douglas Williams Your beliefs don’t make you a better person, your behavior does ~ Sukhraj S. Dhillon Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. ~ Marianne Williamson

Singapore  Social  and  Events  Committee Social  Committee Alcoholics  Anonymous  Singapore  holds  monthly  events.  Details  in  relation  to  these  social  events can  be  obtained  by  sending  an  email  to  sociaalcom@gmail.com. Event  Committee The  Events  Committee  has  agreed  on  dates  for  the  next  Round  Up  after  the  successful  2015  event. This  will  be  held  in  Singapore  on  Saturday  27th  and    Sunday  28th  February  2016.  The  focus  will  be  on the  region  and  speakers  will  be  sourced  from  these  locations. The  Event  Committee  are  looking  for  volunteers  to  assist  with  next  Round  Up.  Please  help  doing some  great  Service  by  sending  an  email  to  events@singaporeaa.com  to  express  your  interest.

Upcoming  A.A.  Events,  Conventions  and  Round  Up’s 29th  AA  Netherlands  Round  Up,  Elspeet,  Netherlands 21st  –  23rd  August  2015 http://www.aa-­‐netherlands.org/roundup2015 10th  Berlin  English  Speaking  AA  Convention  –  Keep  Coming  Back Berlin,  Germany 4th  –  6th  September,  2015 www.berlinAAconvention.com 20th  International  Fall  Round  Up,  Philippines  –  It  works  when  you  work  it. Angeles  City,  Philippines 9th  –  11th    October  2015 http://roundupangelescity.blogspot.sg 7th  Annual  Hong  Kong  International  Convention  –  Willing  to  Grow Hong  Kong 6th  –  8th  November  2015 http://www.hkconvention.org/#!convention/c4nz 53rd  New  Zealand  Convention  of  Alcoholics  Anonymous  –  The  Next  Frontier Waitangi,  New  Zealand 22nd  –  24th  January  2016 http://www.aaconvention.org.nz 1st  Australasian  Convention  –  Carry  the  Message Suva,  Fiji 24th  March  –  27th  March http://aanatcon.org.au