I had a lot of friends, a great job, a wonderful family, a beautiful home and no problem whatsoever: I was unhappy at times and I did not understand why. I was miserable for no apparent reason: I drank over it for 15 years. I thought I would have been okay only if… something of this perfect picture would change: do not ask me what and why and when. I had no answer. One day at the bottom of despair I made a call. I was seated at my office, I was wearing a quite expensive suit. I had 6 small bottles of wine in one of my desk drawer. Cheap wine which you should at least drink chilled: mine was warm, and disgusting. I bought it on my way to the office that morning, at 9 am. By 12 noon the 6 mini bottles were empty and I was considering to go down to the groceries to replenish my supplies. I was very sad, I had a moment of clarity, and acknowledging one more time that something was very, very wrong with me and my life. I could not stand this anymore. I picked up the phone, I made a call to my good friend who suggested some time back that an association called “alcoholic anonymous “, could be of help. I called and a guy answer the phone. He was gentle and understood what was going on. He only said “do not worry: I will send someone talking to you: a woman. Tomorrow night at your place”. And that was the moment my Miracle started. Because that woman came, and in few days I was in a meeting, giving myself a chance. And there were a dozen of people in that room, that night. One of them was celebrating 90 days and I could not believe it. They start talking to me like no one ever did before. They told me that there was hope, and that it was only a 24-hour deal. They smiled, and after the meeting they hugged me. I could not believe it. The following morning few ladies called me, just to say: “Hi! How are you? How are you feeling this morning? Are you coming tonight? I could not believe it. One week later, I still was not drinking. I could not believe it. A month passed by and again no alcohol in my body. I could not believe it but I celebrate my 1st month: everyone in the room cheered. They seemed really happy for me: I could not believe it. The months passed by and months after month I reached my 1st year sober: I could not believe it.

And then, one day I felt something really powerful inside me, something bright, and warm, and incredible and I realized that I was part of these amazing people, one of them in the wonderful fellowship of AA: I came to believe and I have believed ever since. It took me a while to surrender but it was worthy. I came to believe in AA, in the People who saved my life and in a Power greater than myself. My life is a beautiful journey, any new day I thank God, AA and you, my People for the gift of life and for the faith I found in the rooms: I do believe now. Thanks to all of you: I am sober today! Raffaella

“He is a free man, He does not need a bodyguard nor is he confined, he

can go anywhere on this earth where other free men may go”

I am currently on a train heading back to the mountains. I have just been to the nearest AA meeting. This involved a walk, a bus, a train and walk and will be a 7-hour, $70 dollar round trip for the 1-hour meeting. I nearly did not go, I looked out the window this morning and thought it would be a great day to go skiing, but I did what I said I would and got myself out of the house and on a train and I have to say it was worth it! To be with my fellows and hear what I needed to hear. I have been sober for a little over two years. I had told my sponsor that I was going to write something to mark my two-year anniversary but have been procrastinating, waiting for a suitable time, until it felt right, until I felt that I could truly and accurately depict how grateful and happy I am to be sober. If I am honest, there have been numerous times when I could have sat down and done this, but something, that would be me, was stopping me from getting started. I still find this a bit of a struggle, even though I know that by writing instead of talking about it, that the words will come and I will feel better. I know what is stopping me getting pen to paper is my will, and that this can be a dangerous place to be. So I am making the most of the train journey and making this a dedicated day of recovery. I am grateful for the fellowship that has meetings around the world. I have now been to meetings on the East and West Coast of the US, the UK, Australia, in German and Italian parts of Switzerland, Thailand and Singapore. They are all different and they are all the same. Many of you will know what I mean. I am grateful today, for I know that without the fellowship of AA, without meetings, without my sponsor and my friends in the program I would not be in a position to do much of anything. By the time I stopped drinking, I was little more than a body with no soul. I did not care about myself and I did not care about others.