I  have  this  dream,  a  vision  so  to  speak  of  being  an  AA  pioneer  and  spreading  the  message,  AA  has turned  my  life  around  and  all  I  want  to  do  is  give  back. In  2013  Wally  P  came  to  Singapore  and  I  was  lucky  enough  to  attend  the  Back  To  Basics  workshop he  conducted.  I  had  an  aha  moment  and  thought,  ‘I  don’t  need  to  take  people  through  the  steps  in  a year,  so  slowly,  that’s  not  how  Bill  and  Bob  did  it  and  look  where  it  got  them,  a  hugely  growing recovered   fellowship,   so   I   thought   that’s   it,   that’s   how   we   grow   the   fellowship   in   developing countries,  we  do  it  quick,  we  keep  it  simple  and  we  spread  the  message  like  wild  fire.’  I  was  pumped up  and  keen  to  get  started,  I  was  living  in  Singapore  at  the  time  and  I  took  the  message  on  board and  threw  myself  into  service,  but  it  wasn’t  until  a  year  later  that  I  realised  I  could  actually  put Wally’s  message  to  some  good  use. I  had  a  fire  inside  of  me,  a  burning  passion  to  tell  everyone  that  they  can  recover  and  they  are  not alone.   I   decided   to   change   careers   and   work   in   a   treatment   centre   in   Kota   Kinabalu,   Sabah, Malaysia,  yes  Borneo.  I  knew  that  there  was  only  one  meeting  a  week  there  and  it  would  be  tough, but  the  speaker  tapes  from  the  Primary  Purpose  Group  in  Dallas  kept  that  fire  burning  as  I  heard Mike  Chase  say,  ‘wherever  you  go,  whatever  you  do,  as  long  as  you  have  the  big  book  of  Alcoholics Anonymous  with  you,  you  can  stay  sober’,  and  with  that,  my  mission  began. A  good  friend  in  Bali  heard  what  I  hoped  to  do  in  KK  and  gave  me  a  signed  copy  of  Wally  P’s,  Back  To Basics  at  the  Singapore  Round  Up,  another  Godcidence  in  my  recovery  journey.  My  vision  was  this, to  help  alcoholics  in  Sabah,  to  spread  the  AA  message  and  bring  people  to  the  fellowship. So   far   what   we   have   been   able   to   achieve   with   the   help   of   my   wonderful   life   long   friends   in Singapore   is   start   another   meeting,   which   is   a   Big   Book   Study   (with   chips   too),   begin   a   HIPI committee  to  start  spreading  the  word,  have  Singapore  fellows  offer  their  sponsoring  services  via the  internet  and  have  managed  to  get  a  church  on  board  to  support  our  location.  It  helps  that  the Sabahan’s   are   a   beautiful   group   of   people   whose   primary   goal   seems   to   be   serving   others,   a community  suited  to  AA’s  message. Due  to  many  other  commitments  that  our  fellows  have,  it  has  been  slower  in  moving  forward  than  I would  like,  but  what  I  love  is  that  it  is  growing  and  that  is  evident  in  the  continued  work  that  we  do.

I   am   so   grateful   to   God   and   the   fellowship   of   AA.     Today   I   live,   eat   and   breath   recovery,   and   I wouldn’t  have  it  any  other  way,  to  see  the  eyes  of  so  many  light  up  who  had  lost  hope  is  what  keeps that  fire  burning  inside  of  me. If  you  would  like  to  sign  up  for  Skype  sponsorship  and  provide  a  much  needed  service  to  help  the fellows  in  Sabah  please  send  a  message  to  kellyjoconey@gmail.com KJC

A  Deep  Distress  Hath  Humanised  my  Soul Many  alcoholics  report  that  their  condition  can  be  characterised  by  a  psychological  compulsion  of the  mind,  and  physiological  ‘demand’  by  the  body,  to  drink  more  alcohol  once  they  have  taken  the first  drink.  This  phenomenon  is  often  coupled  with  the  delusional  perception  that  they  are  able  to manage  the  situation  and  otherwise  control  their  drinking.  These  conditions  are  surely  true  for  me. For   as   long   as   I   have   lived,   all   of   my   significant   efforts   to   disprove   them   have   been   met   with increasingly  horrific  consequence. It   has   been   said   if   we   are   not   convinced   with   what   we   have,   then   we   can   always   find   a   lower bottom.   Unpleasant   hangovers,   foul   odours,   and   mild   embarrassments   give   way   to   dry   heaves, shakes,  unsightly  personal  appearance,  and  public  shame  …  later  to  be  met  with  loss  of  job,  financial security,  inheritance,  physical  health,  self-­‐respect,  sanity,  friends  and  family.  Just  for  me,  the  long black   march   lower,   next   took   me   to   ambulance   visits,   emergency   rooms,   police,   locked   doors, handcuffs,  violence,  depravity,  monasteries,  suicidal  fixation,  asylums,  and  ultimately,  ‘the  jumping off  place’  as  described  in  the  Big  Book. But  one  element  that  we  hear  of  less  today,  in  the  rooms  dominated  by  open  topic  forums,  is  a  third phenomenon  which  I  can  describe  as  a  spiritual  disconnection  from  God,  the  world,  and  those  we love.   When   I   take   the   first   drink,   my   portal   of   communication   to   God,   to   people   and   to   life,   is slammed  shut  and  barred.  My  prayers  become  canned  and  rehearsed  …  soulless,  as  if  talking  to  a mirror.  Love  is  gone  and  humans  turn  away  for,  “an  alcoholic  in  his  cups  is  an  unlovely  creature.” Just  for  me,  the  journey  to  sobriety  was  always  met  with  definitive  failure,  until  I  accepted  the  idea that   ours   is   neither   a   scientific   nor   a   medical   recovery.   Ours   is   not   an   academic   or   a   rational recovery.  Ours  is  a  spiritual  recovery;  and  my  ability  to  stay  sober  is  leveraged  to  my  connection with  God. Only  Step  I  mentions  the  word  alcohol.  All  remaining  steps  are  related  to  building  and  developing our  relationship  with  a  God  of  our  own  understanding. Bill  W  said:  “I  was  the  recipient  in  1934  of  a  tremendous  mystic  experience  or  “illumination.”  It  was accompanied  by  a  sense  of  intense  white  light,  by  a  sudden  gift  of  faith  in  the  goodness  of  God,  and by  a  profound  conviction  of  His  presence  …  I  fail  to  see  any  great  difference  between  the  sudden experiences  and  the  more  gradual  ones—they  are  certainly  all  of  the  same  piece.  And  there  is  one sure  test  of  them  all:  “By  their  fruits,  ye  shall  know  them.” Step  II.  Came  to  believe  that  a  Power  greater  than  ourselves  could  restore  us  to  sanity

Step  III.  Made  a  decision  to  turn  our  will  and  our  lives  over  to  the  care  of  God  as  we  understood  Him Some  in  the  Fellowship  believe  that  without  an  acceptance  of  Steps  II  and  III,  we  cannot  advance  to the  mission-­‐critical  action  Steps  IV  and  V,  then  on  through  the  rest  of  the  program.  Some  are  of  the view   that   the   lower   success   rate   among   21st   Century   AA’s   is   related   to   the   de-­‐emphasis   of   the Spiritual  Experience  in  our  programme. Watered  down  ‘AA  lite’  was  not  strong  enough  for  me.  There  is  a  line  of  reasoning  that  suggests  we ought  to  dilute  God’s  role  in  AA  when  discussed  in  the  rooms.  This  is  argued  so  as  not  to  alienate  the newcomer,  who  may  be  nonplussed  with  the  concept  of  a  higher  power.  Another  view  is  that  we might  be  doing  a  disservice  to  the  newcomer;  by  representing  that  “Rarely  have  we  seen  a  person fail  who  has  thoroughly  followed  our  path,”  is  anything  less  than  a  spiritual  path.  The  sooner  that  we ‘came  to  believe’  the  better,  so  there  may  be  disadvantages  in  diminishing  the  concept. If  you  would  like  to  discuss  ‘the  Epiphany’,  ‘the  Moment  of  Clarity,’  ‘the  Personality  Change’  or  ‘the Spiritual  Awakening’  as  you  understand  it,  please  join  us  for  an  old  school  Steps  II  and  III  closed meeting   of   Alcoholics   Anonymous,   Thursdays   from   12.30   to   13.30.   Details   are   included   on   the meeting  lists God  bless  you  -­‐  JWD

Singapore  Intergroup  News The   Singapore   Intergroup   is   the   Service   office   that   has   been   established   to   carry   out   certain functions   common   to   all   A.A.   Groups   in   the   Singapore   community.   Operating   under   the guidelines   of   A.A.’s   Twelve   Traditions   and   Twelve   Concepts,   the   Singapore   Intergroup   is maintained,  supervised  and  supported  by  the  local  Singapore  A.A.  groups.  The  primary  purpose of  Singapore  Intergroup  is  to  aid  the  individual  A.A.  groups  in  their  common  purpose  to  carry  the A.A.  message  to  the  alcoholic  who  still  suffers. Intergroup  Minutes  for  Spring  2015 General The  meeting  was  attended  by  Intergroup  members,  members  of  various  committees,  meeting  reps and  was  open  to  anyone  from  the  fellowship. Meeting  Updates

Attendance   at   meetings   is   good   at   Damien   Hall   and   they   have   a   new   treasurer.   Serenity   Sister meetings  are  growing  and  well  attended,  as  is  the  Sunday  Men’s  meeting  with  an  average  of  30  -­‐35 people.    There  is  a  new  Saturday  meeting  at  4  pm  at  We  Care  centre  and  details  are  available  on  the website.    The  Thursday  Speaker  Meeting  at  World  Peace  continues  to  attract  large  numbers,  at  the last  meeting  had  44  members  attend.    Rainbow  meeting  continues  strong.    The  TGIFriday  meeting  is

looking  for  a  new  Chair  although  there  are  some  difficulties  in  finding  the  venue,  and  suggested  that staff  be  briefed  on  how  to  direct  people  to  the  location. The   Tuesday   evening   Novena   meetings   continues   with   a   solid   turnout.   MBFC   Men’s   Meetings continue  with  a  solid  core  group.  The  Monday  BB  meeting  at  World  Peace  continues  well  but  could benefit  from  more  women  attending.    Mana  Mana  meetings  on  Saturday  are  large  with  the  Sunday meetings  attracting  a  smaller  group.  The  Primary  Purpose  group  has  a  core  of  6  -­‐7  people  weekly and  is  growing  as  is  the  Sun  Lions  meeting  which  is  held  in  the  CBD  at  lunchtime.

Representatives  were  requested  to  pass  on  the  following  to  their  Respective  groups:

• Chairs   need   to   be   reminded   to   organise   a   replacement   when   they   cannot   make   a meeting. • All  groups  to  let  Literature  Chair  know  what  is  needed  in  terms  of  literature • Get   contributions   flowing   for   next   newsletter.     Everyone   enjoys   the   Newsletter,   but articles  need  to  be  contributed. • Ask   all   individual   groups   to   have   one   intergroup   rep   so   we   do   not   have   one   person updating  on  more  than  one  meeting.

• Email  is  light. • For  phone  agreed  to  get  a  postpaid  mobile  and  phase  out  fixed  line  over  6  months. • Landline  will  auto  forward  to  mobile  number  and  the  website  will  have  both  numbers,  to  be rationalized  to  mobile  number  eventually. • Working  on  a  rotation  of  12  Step  volunteers  if  calls  result  in  a  12th  Step  visit. Literature

• Large  orders  have  been  placed  on  behalf  of  all  groups. • Needs  no  funds  right  now  will  recoup  some  as  orders  are  distributed  to  the  groups. • Once  the  order  has  arrived  will  communicate  what  pamphlets  are  available  and  these  will  be distributed  accordingly. Website

• Still  updating  some  meetings • New  meeting  at  We  Care  will  be  added  once  attendance  is  established. Newsletter

• Contributions   by   members   are   urgently   required.   Everyone   enjoys   this   publication   but articles  do  not  appear  miraculously. Meeting  lists

• New  printing  run  to  include  We  Care  and  Suntec  meetings. • Wednesday  7:30  AM  Boat  Quay  meeting  is  now  “As  Bill  Sees  It” HIPI

• Still   investigating   IMH   bridge   gap   -­‐   there   is   a   need   for   new   volunteers   to   visit   IMH   on Saturday  mornings. • Another   workshop   for   Healthcare   Professionals   in   September   and   will   follow   the   same format  as  2014 • Looking  at  workshops  for  prisons/  Corrections  Professionals. • Workshop  for  Saba  Group.    AA  member  in  Saba  is  looking  into  starting  an  HIPI  group  there and  will  look  to  Singapore  for  guidance.    This  will  involve  2  people  (1M  1F)  from  Singapore traveling  to  Saba  for  a  weekend  to  deliver  a  Traditions  Workshop.    IG  Chair  asked  if  we  have a  template  for  a  Traditions  workshop  and  if  possible  to  combine  with  the  Service  Workshop of  Aug  29  (see  below). • AA  Singapore  member  is  going  to  Mongolia    in  July  to  take  part  in  the  12  Step  Workshop • IG  Chair  will  register  for  Asia  Oceania  Service  Meeting  and  we  will  pursue  two  attendees taking  place  29  October  –  1  November. Events  and  Social  Committees

• There  will  be  a  Service  Workshop  in  We  Care  from  12-­‐2  PM  on  Saturday,  August  29. Round-­‐Up

• The  2015  round  up  was  a  big  success • There  will  be  changes  to  the  2016  Round  Up  and  this  is  schedule  to  take  place  on  Saturday  & Sunday,  February  27-­‐28,  2016 • The  focus  will  be  on  the  region  and  will  look  to  bring  in  one  outside  speaker  from  the  region (Singapore,  Bali,  Jakarta,  HK  etc) • Looking  at  getting  a  new  venue  –  although  this  can’t  be  confirmed  for  another  couple  of months  (October) • Locals   stated   the   2015   venue   was   too   far   and   too   difficult   to   make   on   Friday   night   with typical  weekend  traffic Next  meeting  scheduled  In  September,  details  will  be  communicated  to  all  Groups  prior  to  the meeting.

“WE” “We,  admitted  we  were  powerless  over  alcohol…” It’s   lovely   to   be   part   of   a   ‘we’.   The   first   time   I   walked   into   the   rooms   I   felt   over-­‐awed   to   be surrounded  by  so  many  honest,  open-­‐hearted,  emotionally  intelligent  people.  People  who  seemed to  be  like  me,  interested  in  self-­‐discovery  and  becoming  a  better  human  being  –  both  spiritually  and emotionally.  The  biggest  surprise  of  all  was  that  all  this  was  apparently  connected  to  not  drinking. Ooh  goodie!  I  thought.  My  personal  path  of  spiritual  growth  is  –  according  to  all  these  wonderful people  who  live  rich  lives  in  sobriety  –  inextricably  linked  to  keeping  me  sober.  God,  Thank  You!  I have  finally  found  the  missing  link  in  my  chain  –  the  chain  of  my  life,  which  somehow  keeps  on breaking. The   break   came   every   time   I   went   out   and   drank   of   course.   My   life   was   a   treadmill   of   physical exercise,  emotional  exercise,  spiritual  exercise,  all  celebrated  with  a  drink,  which  immediately  undid all  the  exercising  progress  and  dropped  me  unceremoniously  in  bed  and  in  a  deep,  dark  funk  for  4 days.   During   these   4   days,   I   could   not   smile.   I   physically   could   not   feel   joy.   Even   if   sat   before   a comedy   –   the   mouth   would   not   move,   the   synapses   in   my   brain   did   not   pump   out   rhythms   of laughter.  I  felt  nothing.  I  was  totally  unmoved.  And  this  scared  me  intellectually.  What  if  I  got  stuck this  way?  A  life  without  the  ability  to  feel  joy  is  no  life  at  all. On  the  5th  day,  however,  the  joy  would  return  spontaneously.  Someone  might  say  something  funny and  I  would  laugh.  Wow!!  I  smiled!  I  laughed!  This  sudden  impulsive  movement  of  my  mouth  into  a wide-­‐frog  grin  felt  so  wonderful.  Spazzy  little  endorphins  would  then  be  released  throughout  my body  with  each  joyful  cheek  action,  and  once  again  I  was  feeling  good!  So  grateful  to  have  my  joy back,  I’d  celebrate.  With  a  drink. It’s  never  one  drink  as  we  know,  so  that  put  me  smack  bang  at  square  one  again:  4  days  feeling generally  crap,  1  day  feeling  good,  1  day  lost  to  unconscious  alcohol  poisoning  and  1  day  promising myself  that  I’m  never  doing  this  again.  Bang  goes  my  life. I  was  tired  of  this  treadmill  and  after  trying  pretty  much  every  other  course  of  action,  I  brought myself  into  the  rooms.  Perhaps  there  I  might  find  people  who  found  drinking  a  curse  and  not  a pleasure. In  the  rooms  I  met  the  “we”.  This  “we”  helps  me  understand  my  condition,  and  we  generously  share our  thoughts  and  hopes  as  they  relate  to  alcoholism  -­‐  as  we  understand  them. But  personally  I  don’t  share  all  that  often.  This  is  for  two  reasons.  One:  because  I  don’t  know  enough about  my  own  illness  yet  to  speak  about  it,  so  I  listen  intently  and  I  look  for  the  similarities.  Two: because  I  don’t  find  many  similarities. Personally  I  don’t  relate  to  a  lot  of  the  things  that  people  talk  about  and  I  therefore  do  not  feel  I  can contribute  to  the  “we”.    I’m  looking  for  the  similarities,  but  if  they  are  not  there,  then  they  are  not there.  I  could  start  lying  and  pretending  it’s  the  same  for  me,  but  contrary  to  what  “we”  says,  I  have never  been  someone  who  lies.  It’s  just  not  something  that  this  alcoholic  has  ever  done.  My  problem

is  boundary  issues  with  regards  to  telling  too  much  truth.  A  problem  none-­‐the-­‐less,  but  a  different problem. My   mind   cannot   be   trusted,   say   ‘we’.   Well,   I   am   someone   who   takes   things   that   are   said   very literally,  and  it’s  terribly  scary  to  a  literal  person  to  be  told  that  they  cannot  trust  their  thoughts.  I checked   myself   straight   in   for   therapy!   Seriously   I   did.   This   is   the   way   my   mind   works.   If   it   can happen,   it   can   happen   to   me.   If   people   tell   me   something   I   personally   am   very   susceptible   to believing   it.     Me   personally,   not   we   alcoholics.   Just   me.   Anyway   a   highly   trained   professional therapist  has  informed  me  that  on  the  contrary,  my  mind  has  actually  worked  very  well  for  me  in the  past,  so  don’t  panic! The  thing  is,  we  are  not  all  the  same.  I  am  not  worse,  I  am  not  better.  I  am  just  my  own  particular sort  of  mess  up! We  all  drank  differently,  we  all  lived  differently,  and  we  are  all  different  in  our  recovery  too.  There will  be  similarities  and  there  will  be  differences. Surely  it’s  better  to  say  we  may  not  be  able  to  trust  the  way  our  minds  think,  we  may  not  always speak  the  truth,  there  may  be  parts  of  our  lives  that  are  unmanageable.  This  I  can  understand  and can  accept.  I  can  allow  for  the  possibility  of  it  being  true.  But  we  can’t  blindly  say  that  we  are  all liars,   and   all   mental…   it   has   consequences!   I   was   moments   away   from   calling   the   men   in   white overcoats  (the  piano  removal  guys  of  course!)  and  asking  them  to  lock  me  safely  away  from  society. I  held  down  my  job  pretty  well  whilst  drinking  –  all  of  a  sudden  it  was  under  threat  in  my  sobriety because  we  said  I  couldn’t  trust  my  own  mind! So   as   much   as   I’m   grateful   to   the   “we”,   I   also   think   it’s   important   to   remember   that   we   is   all different,  and  that  is  glorious  too.  We  are  a  diverse  group  of  people  brought  together  by  a  common disease,  and  within  this  group  we  hope  to  find  those  who  feel  similarly  to  us.  But  if  we  don’t,  that  is also  ok. Very  grateful  to  be  sober  and  very  grateful  to  have  found  AA. Anon.

The  Promises Most  of  us  reading  the  Newsletter  are  familiar  with  the  9th  Step  Promises.    For  this  alcoholic  the reading  of  these  at  a  meeting  never  fails  to  bring  tears  to  my  eyes  and  joy  to  my  heart.  There  are many  more  promises  in  the  Big  Book  and  we  have  included  some  of  these  below. PROMISES  OF  STEP  TWO