brain’s muscle memory and thank my as-yet-unrevealed higher power that, hey, I had one hour of sobriety just by making one meeting that day. It seemed incredulous but I was desperate.

So, I started small with that one prayer. Then the serenity prayer. Then a few more prayers as time went by. Some months later, I put down my last drink. I attended more meetings because I started to enjoy learning from my friends in recovery.

“Dear higher power, thank you for keeping me sober another day. I pray only for the knowledge of your will for me and the power to carry that out. I pray that you keep me sober again tomorrow.”

Unbeknown to me, I had completed steps 1 to 3. A fellow offered to be my sponsor when he saw my suffering. He walked with me during those painful first few months of withdrawals, self- discovery and tons of mistakes, imparting invaluable knowledge to me. I have endless gratitude for his guidance to this day.

I had never prayed before in my life except for a quick death while violently ill from yet another bender. These days, I say the above prayer every night in sincere gratitude.

Today, my higher power takes shape in different forms to me. It evolves, it lives in me and around me. It guides me on this miraculous and wonderful journey with the spirit of the fellowship. All I have to do? Keep coming back.

When I attended my first few meetings, people I didn’t know offered me a slew of advice. Praying was, at that point, the most difficult thing. My aversion to the whole idea of surrendering to some being that I could not see or feel made me stay away from meetings, and from the people who suggested it.

The result of that was a deeper spiral into the bottle and the madness that ensues. After a few more months of blackouts and debt, I dragged my sorry ass back to the meetings to figure out what worked to keep these strangers seemingly happy without alcohol in them.

That turning point was my surrender. I have surrendered to my disease of addiction, and I have surrendered my lack of self-control. These now-familiar strangers tell me that they are my fellows in learning how to stay sober and live a sober life. I found it weird really as it made me think of hobbits, elves and a certain invincible ring.

One fellow suggested to me that simple prayer that I can use even if I had taken a drink that day. It was more to build my